So as discussed part of this self imposed drought in the bedroom I am going through is also to actively attempt to date and put myself out there. The main goal being a shift in the way that I approach relationships and dating in the past.
With that in mind and without lowering standards too significantly the idea was that if you asked me out I would give it a shot.
At the end of last week just that thing happened. He only had one picture, but profile appeared literate, apparently sarcastic, and potentially intelligent. Additionally within 5 pleasant messages he asked me out. For any online date users this is a plus! Also helps you avoid the downward spiral of endless messages with no end in sight.
With date set for Saturday I went about my business and come Saturday was feeling tired and anti-social and seriously contemplated bailing. These are the times when good friends matter, good friends who do not indulge you but rather tell you to snap out of it, put your big girl panties on and go on your date.
First date was all his planning, drinks followed by planned dinner. The dinner was not mentioned in the original ask so I'm assuming it was to be mentioned if and only if I made it through the primary meeting. Which frankly I can appreciate, it's important to have an out. Dinner went long and full of easy conversation that continued until chairs were put on the tables and staff eyed us willing us to leave with their minds. At the end of the night there was some arm linkage as he walked me back to my car, the appropriate level of attempting to get me back to his apartment, and a wholesome kiss good night with a follow up date request.
Lots of texts in between, at the jokey, flirty level, and date 2 set for Tuesday (yesterday). This time I planned and picked a delicious Cuban restaurant on my own "turf", if I have a turf, I don't know. This date also went very well. Conversation was still easy, more comfortable, a little more flirty and got into a bit more real questions about dating history and recent relationships etc... Also followed by a slightly, only slightly, less wholesome kiss goodnight and plans to see each other again.
I'm excited, have twinges of panic (as I do when I potentially like someone - like a freak) and also am yet again amazed by guy radar and the universe's sense of humor (a sense of humor I don't always find funny). On Tuesday I received two messages from the ex, the one who often turns me into Crazy Girl, and a past crush was actually at the bar we met at before dinner. Funny, very funny. I have some theories on what the universe is trying to tell me, two opposite theories in fact. Just gonna ride it out I think...
Back to RVT2013, while the celibacy is still in play, I definitely I'm not feeling like that is going to last super long and now it's a matter of what qualifies for me to make the call. When planning this decision it was if there was "something real" happening, whatever that means.
Maybe I just follow the advice of the Millionair Matchmaker "No sex before monogamy". Oy, I'll keep you posted.
With that in mind and without lowering standards too significantly the idea was that if you asked me out I would give it a shot.
At the end of last week just that thing happened. He only had one picture, but profile appeared literate, apparently sarcastic, and potentially intelligent. Additionally within 5 pleasant messages he asked me out. For any online date users this is a plus! Also helps you avoid the downward spiral of endless messages with no end in sight.
With date set for Saturday I went about my business and come Saturday was feeling tired and anti-social and seriously contemplated bailing. These are the times when good friends matter, good friends who do not indulge you but rather tell you to snap out of it, put your big girl panties on and go on your date.
First date was all his planning, drinks followed by planned dinner. The dinner was not mentioned in the original ask so I'm assuming it was to be mentioned if and only if I made it through the primary meeting. Which frankly I can appreciate, it's important to have an out. Dinner went long and full of easy conversation that continued until chairs were put on the tables and staff eyed us willing us to leave with their minds. At the end of the night there was some arm linkage as he walked me back to my car, the appropriate level of attempting to get me back to his apartment, and a wholesome kiss good night with a follow up date request.
Lots of texts in between, at the jokey, flirty level, and date 2 set for Tuesday (yesterday). This time I planned and picked a delicious Cuban restaurant on my own "turf", if I have a turf, I don't know. This date also went very well. Conversation was still easy, more comfortable, a little more flirty and got into a bit more real questions about dating history and recent relationships etc... Also followed by a slightly, only slightly, less wholesome kiss goodnight and plans to see each other again.
I'm excited, have twinges of panic (as I do when I potentially like someone - like a freak) and also am yet again amazed by guy radar and the universe's sense of humor (a sense of humor I don't always find funny). On Tuesday I received two messages from the ex, the one who often turns me into Crazy Girl, and a past crush was actually at the bar we met at before dinner. Funny, very funny. I have some theories on what the universe is trying to tell me, two opposite theories in fact. Just gonna ride it out I think...
Back to RVT2013, while the celibacy is still in play, I definitely I'm not feeling like that is going to last super long and now it's a matter of what qualifies for me to make the call. When planning this decision it was if there was "something real" happening, whatever that means.
Maybe I just follow the advice of the Millionair Matchmaker "No sex before monogamy". Oy, I'll keep you posted.
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